Guaranteed ways to wake up the kids. 

Every parent understands the beauty of bedtime.  Every parent also understands the frustration of bedtime fails.  The following is a short list of ways I have recently woken up my children. Try not to wake up the kids. Think about having sex. Be completely silent. Plan an at home date night. Plan some personal time. … Continue reading Guaranteed ways to wake up the kids. 

I just want to raise good humans. 

I want the very best for my children.   I want them to be able to achieve whatever goal they will eventually set for their lives. Recently it hit me that I do not care what that goal is,  but I want it to include them being good people.  The evening before my son's first … Continue reading I just want to raise good humans. 

I was the best mom, before I had kids: A cautionary tale. 

I had it all figured out, before I had kids.   Enter baby #1 and the world cracked open to display my inadequacies, short comings, and general dumbassery (autocorrect hated that one). Total Screw Up 1:  I thought pregnancy would be easy. You can stop laughing any time now.   I got pregnant my last … Continue reading I was the best mom, before I had kids: A cautionary tale. 

I wish my life was as perfect as the mom in the comment section. 

I am sure that everyone has read her comments.   She clearly has all her ducks in a row.   Hell,  her ducks are marching in straight military fashion.  You can just picture her perfect little life.  You also kind of hope she chokes on her own bullshit. Any news article about an unfortunate accident, … Continue reading I wish my life was as perfect as the mom in the comment section.